Final Post

Just to be rebellious and because I can (a decision that I think is very reflective of Notes from the Underground) I am going to start with the last question. You ask “what will you most remember?”. What I will remember won’t be a specific theory that Dostoyevsky presented; instead I think I will remember his how he felt. I had always aspired toward intellectualism (which I now realize sounds very foolish) and Dostoyevsky is the epitome of an intellectual. As we discussed in class, Dostoyevsky’s character analyzes and dissects every side to every argument, decision, and thought that he would encounter. In class we described him as being render inactive for being the most indecisive human being on earth, but I saw him as paralyzed. He talks about how amazing and beautiful free will is and the advantage it is for humanity, and yet for him it is a curse. He lives for nothing other than death because that is the only thing he knows for certain, and I cannot seem to wrap my mind around that, this also leads me to think that it may be easier and happier to be blissfully ignorant than paralyzed and in pain.

I know for me when everyone was analyzing his or her passages from the novel I would frantically be going over the next paragraph because I was so afraid I would be called on next and I would not have anything to say. But I also agree that two (three?) weeks of lecturing would have been rather monotonous. I am being completely sincere when I say having the discussion and hearing the other students analyze the novel gave me the chance to hear other student’s perspectives which at times made it easier to understand and relate to Dostoyevsky’s theories.  But my conclusion on the discussion is that the anxiety of having to speak to the class made it hard to solely concentrate on the discussion and in the end the discussion, for the lack of a better phrase, never found its rhythm.

Lastly my answer to the first question is a slightly stronger than weak yes. I can’t even imagine what I would have been like to read Notes from the Underground when it was first released. If I had been asked “was it worth reading” in 1864 it would have been a very, very strong yes. But 150 years have passed since the novel was released and his theories, though revolutionary at the time, have been repeated and used so many times that it no longer sounds new. But I still feel pretty cool when I tell people that I have read the novel so I think reading Notes from the Underground was worth it.